Why I’m awake

Ok, here I am again. I should be sleeping, but I’m trying to get Baby to sleep by herself, therefore depriving myself. Not loving it.
So, I consider myself to be a non-traditional (meaning: not following a tradition) eclectic (meaning: variable belief system) Pagan (meaning: polytheistic, not following the mainstream path). I am not a devil worshipper. I don’t even believe in the devil. I believe that any punishment we receive from the Gods we receive while we’re here and then in the next life. But that discussion, I suppose, is for another day.

I have issues with some of my fellow Pagans. Please keep in mind that Paganism itself is not a religion. It’s a term that encompasses a number of religions, traditions, and spiritual paths. Belief is multible Gods and Goddesses is the number one criteria for a Pagan. Though some Pagans only worship two (The God and The Goddess), most of us believe in a host of Gods. Ok, that’s explained. My main issue is the way Pagans are arguing over how to define themselves. You’d think they’d unite if only to give themselves definition. But nooooo! Oh, the frustration!
I look for fellow Pagans online because the area where I live is very…..conservative. If there are any other Pagans here then they are firmly in the broom closet. So, I want to commune with those that believe as I do. But those that I find are often times worse than the ultra-conservative Christian boards that I hide from. I find that to be very irritating, especially since what I believe doesn’t fall into any one catagory (eclectic). They debate everything from why to hate Christians to what a certain holiday should mean.

One thing that really annoys me is “UPG”. I’ve seen that a lot lately. It means “unproven/unverifiable personal gnosis”. They use this to tell you that they think that you don’t know what you’re talking about. If what you believe (to some, not all) is not in some ancient text book or taught in a mythology class then they label it UPG. I am of the opinion that all gnosis is “personal” and pretty much “unproven/unverified”. Just because the ancient Egyptians wrote hieroglyphs about a certain deity doesn’t make that deity real. But not seeing something in (some sort of) print doesn’t make a personal gnosis not true, either. One can neither prove nor disprove anyone’s religious beliefs, in my opinion.

Well, ok, if they believe that their dog, Fido, is a flying pig and grants wishes, then I guess that can be disproven. But you get my point. As Pagans we are not supposed to judge another’s religion as wrong or right. And yet we judge each other all of the time. Just because I don’t have a degree in anthropolgy or mythology doesn’t mean that I don’t believe in my Gods. Just because my beliefs run the gamut doesn’t mean that I’m a “cafeteria” Pagan. Some of us believe because we were called and there was no ignoring that call. And others, in my opinion, just study the old religions to get under others skin. Pagan or not it makes not difference to them.
I especially hate that they bash Christians so much. Yes, it’s true, a lot of Christians are very judgemental and don’t want to learn what we’re about. But most Christians don’t care. They figure their God will sort us to the appropriate place in Hell and all they have to worry about is themselves. More power to them, I say.

Pagans for some reason hate the idea of organizing. And they’re a rebellious lot, anyway. So that makes us hard on ourselves. No one else has to persecute us. We do a good enough job. I don’t think that I’d call myself a Pagan if I had any other options. But my beliefs are deep and strong. Even if my knowledge of the history of the world is weak. I was called by my Goddess and I do what I can to honor her. I just don’t do it in a way that other Pagans find “pagan”. There are others like me, unfortunately. Maybe we should unite and give ourselves a different kind of name.
Next up: Fundamentalists

I like geeky stuff, politics, squirrels and monkeys.

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