My 4th of July this year was phenomenal. I took Lil’lady, my sister and Lil’lady’s friends to my best friend’s house1. She lives on 2 acres just outside of town. It’s a gorgeous property. Anyway, it was a party so there was lots of food and drink. And, of course, Biff invited a dude over – just in case.
Well, I wasn’t interested in that dude at all, but I had a great time anyway. We ate; I had a long convo with Biff’s mother-in-law about how much Trump sucks and what we’re going to do when he brings the apocalypse; the kids went swimming; and everyone (except the kids) had some drink. So, in the evening the guys decided to be stupid and build their own fireworks.
Biff’s friend used to be Amish, so he knows how to make bullets and has his own gun powder. They stuffed little pieces of pvc pipe and went down by the creek to set them off. They were freaking loud. One of them threw plastic over to where we were sitting. I suppose someone should have been angry and got after them, but we were having fun and isn’t there supposed to be booms? Then they brought out the fireworks and it was great. They added some gun powder to a tube and they shot pretty far. I don’t know exactly what they were doing as they’re crazy hillbilly men2 and I didn’t want to ask. There was one time where things were iffy and that was when the tube couldn’t take anymore and a big display actually went off only 3 feet in the air. It was pretty but scared the shit out of us. Then we discovered everyone was fine and laughed about it.
After that they lit the bonfire. They had a pile of trees that they’d cleared from the back acre3. And I think there may have been a bed in there. I’m not sure. It was a pretty fire. The kids stopped swimming and took marshmallows down there. Biff has MS, so she can’t walk very far so we got in a golf cart and drove down there. That was an adventure in itself because it was dark, there are no lights on the cart and we had to go over a small bridge (that was meant for a tractor). Because I couldn’t see I was trying to follow the dog, who was happily leading the way. The problem? Moto (his name) is a black Lab. So, it was fun watching him dodge in and out of the shadows. As you can tell, we made it safely. We did so well we decided to drive all over the property. Because why not? We had a merry time. I believe there was a discussion on what would happen if we went off the bridge. It’s a small drop into a small creek and I decided I would save us both. Luckily we didn’t find out what would happen.
Biff had invited a lot of people, but, sadly, most of them didn’t show up. She and her husband used to have magnificent parties – complete with a band and open bar. People used to love going out there. But then she and her husband would fight. And fight. And do stupid shit. People would feel uncomfortable. For a while, he hated me and would torment me until I’d leave or we’d get into a fight. One year he shot freaking bottle rockets at me and the kids. Anyway, that kind of stuff made a lot of people uncomfortable so they stopped coming out. No one wants to see that.
But since Biff’s MS has progressed her husband has mellowed out. A lot. He’s very gentle with her and doesn’t argue at all. So it’s been nice to go out. Of course, he still agitates me sometimes, but I shut him down pretty quickly. I’m not fighting with him. He has to deal with me whether he likes it or not. Sadly, now no one comes when she sends invites. And that really hurts her feelings. Where is everyone? A few people kept saying they were coming last night but they never showed up. So, she deactivated her Facebook and decided she hates them all. Since she doesn’t leave her house much anymore the parties are the only social interaction she gets (aside from me and her sisters – who didn’t come either). I imagine folks were worried about her husband losing his shit last night. I wanted to tell everyone not to worry, but I didn’t want to tell her why folks don’t care to come out anymore. I have no idea how to go about all that. I’m pretty upset for her. She really wanted a lot of people to come.
In other news, I’ve decided I like being single. I have no one to answer to except my immediate family and the law. No man to worry about pissing off when I’m out having fun. No one to check in with. No one to cheat on me or to use me or play with my head. I don’t know how long I’ll love being single but it could be a long time. The last time I ended a long-term relationship I stayed single for 6 years. I had friends and lovers, but never, ever let anyone claim me. And I never pretended to be loyal to anyone. Everyone I dated knew I was dating other people. I loved being single. Until I met TheMan and decided to stop being so wild. I’d forgotten how wonderful being on my own really is. TheMan, of course, jumped right into another relationship and is worried about getting married when her divorce is final. I think that’s hilarious. I have no plans to ever get married again and am seriously considering just staying single and just having friends again. Why not?
I’m going out to dinner on Friday with one guy and, I think, the drive-in on Saturday with another. Also, I’ll be going to a baseball game with another dude that I know from work. This way I won’t get attached to anyone like I did with MyDude and I’ll still have fun. I have my walls back up and stronger than before. A guy that can get through my barrier will be a keeper, but I don’t think I’ll find anyone interested in trying for a while. I was weak with MyDude, I’ll admit. That’s not happening anymore. I’m a strong woman and I’ll be damned if someone does anything like he did to me again. I hate being miserable so I’ll pass on that thankyouverymuch.
And now I’m off to the gym. Not to make myself beautiful for anyone except myself. I’m determined to make this a fantastic summer.
I like geeky stuff, politics, squirrels and monkeys.