I like to break things

Well, I’m back from the flu, so let’s get down to the funny stuff.



White House Rejects Special Counsel



Now, I know that you’re very surprised that the Bush Administration wouldn’t want a special counsel to investigate the illegal spying on Americans. Why on Earth are they fighting this if everything is on the up and up? I think we all need to remember that BushCo can do whatever they want and the laws of the United States be damned.

In a letter released Monday, 18 House Democrats told Bush that Attorney General Alberto Gonzales should appoint a special counsel. They said the surveillance of terrorists must be done within the bounds of U.S. law, but complained that their efforts to get answers to legal and factual questions about the program have been stymied — “generally based on the feeblest of excuses.”


“If the effort to prevent vigorous and appropriate investigation succeeds, we fear the inexorable conclusion will be that these executive branch agencies hold themselves above the law and accountable to no one,” wrote the lawmakers, led by Rep. Zoe Lofgren , D-Calif., a member of the Judiciary and Homeland Security committees.

I don’t know where Rep. Lofgren has been, but that’s exactly what the executive branch does. There is no law that will hold them back. And if there is one, then the people better not find out about it or else.

President Bush’s spokesman Scott McClellan said those Democrats should instead spend their time investigating the source of the unauthorized disclosure of the classified program, which “has given the enemy some of our playbook.”

Why, Scottie, you didn’t give those darned terrorists very much credit, that’s fer shor. Look, anyone that knows anything about American life (especially according to Hollywood action/adventure movies) knows that any kind of electronic activity is up for scrutiny by the feds. Even teenagers come up with their own kinds of code in case their parents are spying on them. Come on, now, can we all agree that if these terrorists are organized and patient enough to pull off one of the greatest attacks on U.S. soil then they aren’t going to be stupid enough to talk about their plans on the phone? Of course, Scottie and his boss don’t expect most of us to actually use our brains, because they only really listen to the people who don’t.


By the way, Scottie, what’s so hard about getting a warrant 3 entire days after you’ve already started the eavesdropping?

In their six-page letter, the Democrats said the special counsel should investigate any possible violation of federal criminal law, noting that the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act says the monitoring of U.S. citizens and residents — without a warrant — is punishable by imprisonment.

Ah, well here we are. They don’t want to go to the joint. Of course, why didn’t I think of that? They don’t have anything to worry about so, instead of agreeing to the special counsel to clear their good names, they say “no, you don’t need to know anything good or bad.” I know that certainly makes me feel better. I certainly wouldn’t be a good American if I wondered why they wouldn’t go along with this if they had nothing to worry about. And yet they want to prosecute the person who leaked this information_[1], and even the NY Times for publishing it. Please don’t tell me it’s to save money. We all know how much the BushCo likes to spend money on useless garbage. What’s worse- a cheating husband or a criminal for a president?


_{[1] A hero in my book, by the way}