Coming Back

So, I mentioned that I believe in reincarnation, right? The purpose, I believe, of reincarnation is to allow our souls to become knowledgeable and flourish, to become one with the Gods. Of course, one’s soul is born ignorant and must learn through many lives and their trials. It’s like following a trail without a map and you must learn which way gets you ahead and which ones put you back. Well, I’m not really trying to educate anyone here. I’m just spouting my own beliefs and I don’t have to convince myself why I believe them.

Here’s the thing. I’ve been looking at babies a lot lately (especially my own). I notice a lot of differences in the way babies look at people. Some babies seem to have a really clueless look on their face, so happy and uninformed, their souls just starting out (I’m thinking…). Anyway, then there are those babies that look at you with such old eyes. It’s uncanny. My very own baby had old eyes. When she looks at me it’s almost like she knows what I’m thinking. Like she’s telling me that she’s not as stupid as everyone thinks she is, she just can’t express herself because she’s in a new body. My husbands cousin had eyes like that when he was a baby. You could see it in the pictures. I think he’s about 8 now and he still looks like he knows a lot. However, I believe that babies are more knowledgeable about their own souls because they have all the memories of their past lives. I think they lose that over time because they learn that kind of stuff just isn’t normal. So they suppress it. I see that kind of thing in my baby. I’m tempted to say that it scares me, but it doesn’t. I’m very curious about it. If I raised her with my spiritual beliefs would she then be able to become psychic? Would she be more intelligent? More special? If she used what she already has and doesn’t learn to push it away and think of herself as abnormal will that make her better?

Of course, I have no idea what I’m talking about. That’s why I usually just spout nonsense. But today I was looking at my baby’s eyes and they just seemed so old. Like she’d lived a long time. I wonder what lifetime she’s in and what lessons she’s got to learn to move on. I wonder that about both of my girls. My son spent all of 36 minutes visiting this lifetime. He’s moved on. I think his life was more of a lesson for me and my husband than for himself. And then our daughter arrived 10 months and 3 weeks later…. I think that somehow I’m more blessed than I thought when she was born. I think that I really have a special little girl. I hope she passes this test with flying colors.

I like geeky stuff, politics, squirrels and monkeys.

Holidays gone

It’s funny comparing Pagans from metropolitan areas to “country” Pagans. In the cities there is almost a guaranteed anonymity so they’re free to “come out of the broom closet”. They don’t have to worry about repercussions of any sort. They can have Pagan Pride festivals and fight to have a Yule Log burning right beside a Nativity Scene and Menorah. They know that most people will be accepting if not all together understanding of their beliefs.

Unfortunately it doesn’t work that way for the country folk. They have to hide their jewelry and clothes the curtains when they celebrate holidays. That doesn’t mean that the government will come down on them–unless they have children. Then their religious beliefs could come under intense scrutiny and their kids could be taken away. Neglect they call it. Also, the neighbors are likely to vandalize a country Pagan’s home, who gets no help from the local police department. It’s sad that this happens in this country in this day and age, but it does happen.

The city dwellers don’t understand what the country folk are so worried about (unless they started out country and moved to get away from the closed minds). They’re used to the more intellectual and free thinking crowds that swarm the cities. They’re used to the conversations they have on the grounds of the University. They can’t imagine someone coming right out and calling them “Evil” and telling them that they’re going to hell. 2005 and that still happens….sigh Let’s move on.

Christians do not regularly fear for their safety and that of their family because of their religious beliefs. They do not have to worry about losing their jobs because they wear their religious jewelry. They don’t have to fight to keep custody of their children because they take them to church. Pagans, on the other hand, are fighting battles like this everyday. Though we are becoming more and more recognized we’re also becoming more and more hated (because the zealous right is starting to take us seriously).

I personally have not problem saying “Merry Christmas” to anyone. Where I live is a Conservative Christian area and it’s pretty much expected that if you’re alive in this town then you’re Christian. There aren’t even any Jewish Temples in the entire county. I’m glad that I have that time off of work and that my daughter doesn’t have to go to school for two weeks at that time. I know that Christmas is a usurped holiday, that Christ wasn’t born on that day. Pagans celebrated the return of the sun for thousands of years and the Christians wanted something just as important to put in it’s place when they took over power and went about converting the masses.

(Note: “Winter solstice is a celebration of the birth of the sun and Christmas is the celebration of the birth of the son.” See a correlation here?)

There are countless examples and theories about that, but I don’t bother my Christian neighbors with that. I use that time to do my own thing. Christmas is a special holiday to me insomuch as I enjoy the company of family, the fellowship, food and, of course, presents. If they want to celebrate it for religious reasons, more power to them. I celebrate for secular reasons and enjoy the federal holiday off.

And to those Christians who feel persecuted because someone said “Happy Holidays” to you instead of “Merry Christmas” I say “GET OVER YOURSELF!”

Glad tidings and Blessings.

I like geeky stuff, politics, squirrels and monkeys.

Why I’m awake

Ok, here I am again. I should be sleeping, but I’m trying to get Baby to sleep by herself, therefore depriving myself. Not loving it.
So, I consider myself to be a non-traditional (meaning: not following a tradition) eclectic (meaning: variable belief system) Pagan (meaning: polytheistic, not following the mainstream path). I am not a devil worshipper. I don’t even believe in the devil. I believe that any punishment we receive from the Gods we receive while we’re here and then in the next life. But that discussion, I suppose, is for another day.

I have issues with some of my fellow Pagans. Please keep in mind that Paganism itself is not a religion. It’s a term that encompasses a number of religions, traditions, and spiritual paths. Belief is multible Gods and Goddesses is the number one criteria for a Pagan. Though some Pagans only worship two (The God and The Goddess), most of us believe in a host of Gods. Ok, that’s explained. My main issue is the way Pagans are arguing over how to define themselves. You’d think they’d unite if only to give themselves definition. But nooooo! Oh, the frustration!
I look for fellow Pagans online because the area where I live is very…..conservative. If there are any other Pagans here then they are firmly in the broom closet. So, I want to commune with those that believe as I do. But those that I find are often times worse than the ultra-conservative Christian boards that I hide from. I find that to be very irritating, especially since what I believe doesn’t fall into any one catagory (eclectic). They debate everything from why to hate Christians to what a certain holiday should mean.

One thing that really annoys me is “UPG”. I’ve seen that a lot lately. It means “unproven/unverifiable personal gnosis”. They use this to tell you that they think that you don’t know what you’re talking about. If what you believe (to some, not all) is not in some ancient text book or taught in a mythology class then they label it UPG. I am of the opinion that all gnosis is “personal” and pretty much “unproven/unverified”. Just because the ancient Egyptians wrote hieroglyphs about a certain deity doesn’t make that deity real. But not seeing something in (some sort of) print doesn’t make a personal gnosis not true, either. One can neither prove nor disprove anyone’s religious beliefs, in my opinion.

Well, ok, if they believe that their dog, Fido, is a flying pig and grants wishes, then I guess that can be disproven. But you get my point. As Pagans we are not supposed to judge another’s religion as wrong or right. And yet we judge each other all of the time. Just because I don’t have a degree in anthropolgy or mythology doesn’t mean that I don’t believe in my Gods. Just because my beliefs run the gamut doesn’t mean that I’m a “cafeteria” Pagan. Some of us believe because we were called and there was no ignoring that call. And others, in my opinion, just study the old religions to get under others skin. Pagan or not it makes not difference to them.
I especially hate that they bash Christians so much. Yes, it’s true, a lot of Christians are very judgemental and don’t want to learn what we’re about. But most Christians don’t care. They figure their God will sort us to the appropriate place in Hell and all they have to worry about is themselves. More power to them, I say.

Pagans for some reason hate the idea of organizing. And they’re a rebellious lot, anyway. So that makes us hard on ourselves. No one else has to persecute us. We do a good enough job. I don’t think that I’d call myself a Pagan if I had any other options. But my beliefs are deep and strong. Even if my knowledge of the history of the world is weak. I was called by my Goddess and I do what I can to honor her. I just don’t do it in a way that other Pagans find “pagan”. There are others like me, unfortunately. Maybe we should unite and give ourselves a different kind of name.
Next up: Fundamentalists

I like geeky stuff, politics, squirrels and monkeys.